How To Sell A Goat

After a few decades in the marketing trenches I was asked to teach marketing courses at Georgia State University.

In the first session of my advertising classes I ask the students if think they could be copy writers. They all say yes, with varying degrees of conviction.

Then I ask them to prove it: “OK, I have reserved advertising space in tomorrow’s paper. I have a goat that I want to get rid of. Write a headline for my ad.”

They set to work, and after a few minutes they gleefully want to share their inspirations. Some of the memorable lines were, “Buy a cheap labor saving device,” or “Give this poor goat a loving home.” In every class someone comes up with a version of, “Don’t let somebody else get your goat.”

I stop the hilarity and say, “Is this a Billy or a Nanny Goat?” Someone answers, “We don’t know, you didn’t tell us.” I reply, “You didn’t ask.”So it goes with other questions: How old is this goat? Is it healthy? Does it come from a line of good goats? Why is it for sale? “You didn’t tell us!” Again, “You didn’t ask.”

Then I get into the buyer. Who buys goats, and why? What are some problems with goats? “How should we know?” they protested.

The point of this story is you should never write an ad until you know what you’re talking about. So far I’ve only had one student who refused the assignment. She said, I don’t know anything about this goat. I can’t do it.” (She was engineering major.) If you want to sell a goat, get steeped in goat lore. Get to know goat owners and goat lovers. Go so far as to get one yourself.

Then decide, what is the one most important thing you should claim about this goat? That is its positioning. Only then are ready to write an ad, and your ad will have a good chance of actually selling that goat.

And that’s what advertising is all about. Some think it’s about building awareness, or creating an image. Wrong! It’s not creative unless it sells!

The best definition of advertising came out a hundred years ago, before radio and

TV: Advertising is SALESMANSHIP in print.

Were you ever sold by an ad? Why did it work for you—meaning, why did you run out and buy that product?